Little things

It is the little moments that can bring the greatest clarity and joy. I took a day off yesterday to spend with my family, as this is the first week of a two week "mid-winter break" imposed on the French school-year and that disrupts it quite significantly to say nothing of the families who have to cope with looking after their schoolage children. But hey otherwise when would people have the chance to go skiiing, right - so it's all good?
In the morning I took three of my offspring to a swimming centre while the fourth was off all day at a table tennis camp. And there was an intensely sweet moment when the two older girls were amusing themsleves with newly purchased masks and snorkels, whilst my youngest ASD-suffering daughter was, for the first time, independently waiting patiently inline for her turn to go on a water slide without needing to have her hand held or be supervised closeup to make sure she took her turn appropriately. I was able to just sit by the side of the pool, feet dangling in the warm water and actually relax for a few minutes, the first time EVER when I have been supervising the girls at the pool.
And it felt like - wow, maybe I haven't fucked things up for them too much after all.